![]() I am only ever me and I am here, where I already know I do not wish to be. I try to hold on, try to be someone and stay somewhere I am not, but I can’t. A sheet is pulled over my body, it smells unfamiliar and I consider the possibility that I’m in a hotel. It feels heavier than it used to, as though it is weighing me down. I sense the light behind my eyelids and my attention is drawn to the platinum band on my finger. For now, for just a second longer, I’m enjoying the self-medicated delusion that permits me to imagine that I could be anyone, I could be anywhere, I could be loved. ![]() ![]() A moment of intense pleasure or pain, before your senses reboot and inform you who and where and what you are. Those precious few semi-conscious seconds before you open your eyes, when you catch yourself believing that your dreams might just be your reality. ![]() I’ve always delighted in the free fall between sleep and wakefulness. ![]()
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